“Dolce far niente” : The joy of doing nothing

There is something delightfully extravagant about doing nothing after a while of doing everything. Christmas is my favourite time of the year. Like birthdays, it’s a time for me to come together with the most important people in my life and look back on the year before, in the midst of laying the table on Christmas eve, pulling crackers, washing the dishes, walking to church on Christmas morning, opening and giving presents and swimming in the amazing South African heat at 12pm on Christmas day.

Some people think tradition is cheesy; I think it’s classy – and extremely special. Every year we do the same thing at the same time, and I love that. And as I write this, everyone’s gone back to their own homes, the ripping of wrapping paper has ended, and I’m sitting on my mom’s bed with her watching television series. I haven’t a worry in the world, and best of all – its Christmas day.

So this got me thinking a lot about a line in a recent movie with the spectacular Julia Roberts in. Thanks to Matty, I watched Eat Pray Love twice, and the second time I listened extra carefully. When in Rome, she learns an Italian line; Dolce far niente. The joy of doing nothing. And she wakes up late in Italy and makes some food and sits in her tiny lounge eating it for what seems the whole day.

I fully agree with this romantic Italian phrase. But I think what makes it much more special is who you are doing nothing with. This holiday has been a busy one, but a couple times I have experienced a dolce far niente with people that mean the world to me.

I visited Matty after Sugar Bay at Michaelhouse. Now this place is in the Midlands, where if you stand in the front yard you simply see green and blue. Nothing else. We spent amazing time with each other and I got to know Matty even better than I already did. I got to know him out of Rhodes and in his life back home. We talked and laughed and were silly, but we also sat together in silence. We baked and we watched movies and we went for drives…We did nothing, together. And that’s what made “the joy” in doing nothing, so blissful.

I think if we all took the time to do nothing, with people that mean something important in our lives – we could live much happier lives. If a couple more days of my life were like Christmas day and similar to life at Michaelhouse, I would realise more how easy life actually is. What humans do is we automatically trouble ourselves with things that don't actually matter at all, we like to complicate things. We have this need to create noise to fill the silences, and we yearn for things to do to keep us busy. We don’t always need to be busy and crazy to be considered as people “living their lives’. Sometimes, all we actually need is a longer bath… and someone, anyone, to sit in the silences with.

Merry Christmas happy readers!