Shiny.

My mom and I have always been really close. And when I think of her when I miss her in Grahamstown, one of the first things I think of is how annoying her message alert tone is on her cellphone. Sweet huh? Haha no it is her favourite Parlotones song Bird in flight and it plays the entire song until she finds her phone to turn it off. It has one of those really loud bang bang intros that when it comes out the phone speaker, sounds like hardi-dar birds. But, I end up missing hearing it.

Anyway, as a post world cup musing I went to watch one of my favourite South African bands, The Parlotones. When they first became known, I didn’t think much of them but slowly song after song I started listening to their lyrics more carefully, which on their new album – are particularly inspiring. These are some of the lyrics from my mom’s favourite tune;

Stop holding on so damn tight - love is like, it's like a bird in flight. The tighter you grip. The looser it slips, love is like, it's like a bird in flight.

When I was watching these guys I was reminded of last year a lot. When I let go, I believed that what I lost would come back to me one day. Now I see that it isn’t about that. Whether the bird you let go comes back to you, isn’t up to you. Exactly what the lyrics say, the tighter you grip the more it slips away. So only recently I stopped holding onto this idea I had of creating my own fate. Whatever happens surely is meant to be. And to be a total cliché, everything happens for a reason. This might just be a convenient formula that allows us to shed responsibility for our actions, but if you’re living your life and feeling good about it – then it must be true. Nothing happens by means of chance or good or bad luck. Everything in life tests the limits of our hearts. If whatever your bird is you may have let go, if it flies back to you, then it was meant to be. But if it doesn’t, then that isn’t up to you anymore to make it. I am equally free as the love in my life is, after all.

I am back at Rhodes now after a nice long break, and I was just telling my mom that I feel like I have 'rebonded' with a lot of old friends. It was so nice. Katz, Sim and I had a big drunk sleep over the other night which was hell fun :) It reminded me that the precious things in life are always there, you just need to take the time to appreciate them. Sim took these photos of me that are up which are really cool too. Katz once told me that things happen when you stop looking. She was right. And plus, life is too short to look for things. It doesn’t make any sense to waste that time. I believe what the Parlotones say in one of my favourite songs by them;

Feed me fantasy, so I'll believe - We're gonna fly to the moon. Side step reality - Build my world on fantasy, We're gonna fly to the moon. We'll build a ladder, we'll build a ladder and we'll climb to the moon. We'll grow some wings, we'll grow some wings, And we'll fly to the moon.

And we'll dream with open eyes, not in the recess of our murky minds. (I adore that line)

I might not be totally aware of reality, I’m quite ditzy sometimes actaully and I often try and side step reality’s harshness and pretend I am in my own fantasy world. Have a little day dream every now and then, okay actually a lot. But its what I live off. I live off my dreams and I get all my energy from just knowing that making them into reality is actaully possible. As ridiculous as they might be. And they really are. I keep meaning to put up my bucket list but I add to it almost every day – so it would have to be edited all the time. This isn’t a bad thing :) But the cool thing is that reality is sweeetass too. It is when your fantasy world merges with your real one that firework explosions happen in life.

But people generally still seem to be concerned with what their purpose is and where they are meant to be going and are they heading in the right direction or not. My answer? It’s surely not worth worrying about too much. If you have goals and dreams to go somewhere and do something, then it is surely up to you to make that happen. And when it does, life will take you somewhere else, and you will meet people who might change your life. And ones who might not. And ones who may come back later and ones you will neer see again. How do we know what life’s plan is? We don’t. Its that simple.

I read somewhere that the description of fate is the universal principle by which the order of things is presumably prescribed. I like to think that whatever is prescribed all has meaning. And when it happens, whether we make it happen or it catches us somewhat offguard, it was meant to happen anyway. And if you are absurdly keen to know what life has in store for you, remember this – we often meet our fate on the road we take to avoid it. A french proverb told me that. It’s smart.

Einstein, that genius of a man once said; strange is the situation here upon earth. It is strange, and people are strange. But it is wonderful. As I have grown up and the people around me have grown up I have seen that everyone is starting to realise that life is too short. Especially at university and any student vibe.. It is just full of young people wanting to make something out of their lives. I think we have all come to realise that instead of being taught something and then being tested on it like we were at school, we are now just given the test straight away and the outcome teaches us the lesson.

Some Hindu spiritual guy says that the key to life is to take up one idea and make that idea your life. Think of it, dream of it, live on it. Let the brain, muscles, nerves and every part of your body be full of that idea and just leave every other idea alone. I like to think that ideas and dreams are limitless and over and above the pain this life may cause sometimes, having more than one idea or dream gives us the right energy we need. Seriously, the possibilities of this world are endless.

After all, the sun comes up every day doesn’t it? And until it doesn’t, we better give it a good reason to shine for us.

Let’s all be indispensable. And when our lives flash before our eyes one day, let’s make sure it is worth watching.

Thoughts on a film or two

I recently watched two Sandra Bullock movies, both which I really enjoyed. She is one of my favourite big screen actors and these two movies put the pin down on some life lessons in two very different ways. I watched two really different movies in which Bullock plays two very different roles; The Blind Side and All about Steve.

The Telegraph's website, a page I visit quite often described The Blind Side beautifully;

The Blind Side is blind to ambiguity or to complexity. It’s a celluloid version of Paul McCartney and Stevie’s Wonder’s Ebony and Ivory, one in which pious, infantilizing didacticism masquerades as humanitarianism. “The past is gone. The world’s a good place,” Leigh tells Michael.

Sometimes we need that sort of boost in our lives from things like movies to inspire or motivate. We are only human after all and we can’t always get it from our own inner energy. Movies like this really remind me that my life is not so bad. The two voiceovers at the end of each movie by the protagonists were really meaningful to me;

Michael Oher; “Courage is a hard thing to figure. You can have courage based on a dumb idea or mistake, but you're not supposed to question adults, or your coach or your teacher, because they make the rules. Maybe they know best, but maybe they don't. It all depends on who you are, where you come from. Didn't at least one of the six hundred guys think about giving up, and joining with the other side? I mean, valley of death that's pretty salty stuff. That's why courage it's tricky. Should you always do what others tell you to do? Sometimes you might not even know why you're doing something. I mean any fool can have courage. But honor, that's the real reason for you either do something or you don't. It's who you are and maybe who you want to be. If you die trying for something important, then you have both honor and courage, and that's pretty good. I think that's what the writer was saying, that you should hope for courage and try for honor. And maybe even pray that the people telling you what to do have some, too.”

And then there’s Mary from All About Steve, although a complete ditz throughout the whole movie, her character made quite some sense at the end when she compared doing a crossword to life in general; “New York Times crossword editor Will Shortz says we all have a natural compulsion to fill empty spaces. I like to think he means not just with crosswords, but the empty spaces inside of us that come from making your way in a world that doesn’t always embrace unique. I try to fill my empty spaces with words.”

Yeah, evidently me too :)

Courage is a tricky thing. Whether we need it to fill empty spaces or jump from an aeroplane, we will always need it somewhere along the road in life. These two films made me realize that we may not be able to change the past, and we need courage to realise this. But at the end of the day, even though it might be hard to see it; the world is a good place. Everything that has happened did so for a reason. Personally, I have just had to let go of something I can’t change about the past, and I think we all have to at some point. And in my point of view, if something is meant to happen, it will. Just like Michael Oher said; it is who you are, where you come from, and what you do that makes you someone in this world. And if he can find courage from a back ground such as his, then why can’t we all? Whether you think the world is a bad place or good place, you’re still someone in it right?

And we have to make the most of that. It’s important.